If I had known...

Whispers of gold caress my ears
with their cock-a-doodle-doo.

I embrace the glow

still half asleep
and get to my feet. I go out barefoot
so as to leave no trace, stealthy
and complicit
in what the wall reflects.

I chase a sound
at the end of the gallery
in the country house,
and to the washroom I go.

A closed box intrigues me
in the corner,
I tiptoe closer...
and lift the lid.
The fluttering of dozens of chicks,
little feathers floating through the air
and the shrill peeping...

dazzle me.

I approach carefully.
On my knees on the floor,

I can see them better.

I'm drawn to
one that's yellow like my hair
I speak sweetly to it

and I tie it up tenderly
with the fingers of my innocence.
It tries to escape.
I pull its neck taut,

thin and long...

Silence.
Three years are not enough
to understand why
it doesn't look at me anymore.